Magna Carta to be Bought, Branded With Asterisk

Posted by Wolfrum at 11:00 AM on September 26, 2007.

Wolfrum: "Being that Habeas Corpus is essentially meaningless in the U.S., so is the Magna Carta, really," said a potential buyer.

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The Magna Carta

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This post, written by Wolfrum, originally appeared on Shakesville

When fashion designer Marc Ecko purchased the ball Barry Bonds hit for his record-breaking 756th home run, he created an online poll and let the public decide what he should do with the ball he bought for more than $750,000.

The end result - Ecko will mark the ball with a large asterisk then send it to Major League Baseball's Hall of Fame. The asterisk is a sign of protest by the many fans who believe Bonds' achievement is tainted due to rumors and allegations of steroid abuse by the San Francisco Giants slugger.

This idea appears to have crossed over, as now a historic document appears ready to go through the same treatment.

H. Ross Perot, billionaire and former candidate for President, has announced he will auction off his copy of the Magna Carta. The 13th century document, which was on display at the National Archives in Washington for more than 20 years.

The document explicitly protected certain rights of the king's subjects -- most notably the right of Habeas Corpus, meaning that they had rights against unlawful imprisonment.

The copy is expected to fetch a price of up to $30 million at auction. Nonetheless, several potential buyers have come forward saying they plan on "Bondsifying" the document with a large asterisk before donating it back to the National Archives.

"Being that Habeas Corpus is essentially meaningless in the U.S., so is the Magna Carta, really," said one anonymous potential buyer. "It really needs an asterisk so everyone knows it's not something we take seriously anymore."

Other potential buyers have added that they'd like to buy a copy of the U.S. Constitution, as well, and mark it with an asterisk.

"If you're going to privatize everything, you may as well sell the Constitution, also," said one anonymous billionaire buyer. "I mean, obviously it's been sold out from under us figuratively, so why not literally? It would be perfect for an asterisk. Aside from that part about quartering soldiers, it's become a pretty quaint old document, wouldn't you say?"

Tagged as: magna carta, us constitution

Wolfrum is a regular blogger for Shakesville