DUI

Recently a routine police patrol parked outside a bar in Bandera, Texas.
After Last Call the officer noticed a man leaving the bar so intoxicated
that he could barely walk. The man stumbled around the parking lot for a few
minutes, with the officer quietly observing.

After what seemed an eternity and trying his keys on five different vehicles
the man managed to find his car which he fell into. He sat there for a few
minutes as a number of other patrons left the bar and drove off.

Finally he started the car, switched the wipers on and off (it was a fine,
dry summer night), flicked the blinkers on, then off a couple of times,
honked the horn and then switched on the lights. He moved the vehicle
forward a few inches, reversed a little and then remained still for a few
more minutes as some more of the other patron vehicles left.

At last, the parking lot empty, he pulled out of the parking lot and started
to drive slowly down the road. The police officer, having patiently waited
all this time, now started up the patrol car, put on the flashing lights,
and promptly pulled the man over and approached the car carrying a
breathalyzer test kit.

To his amazement the breathalyzer indicated no evidence of the man having
consumed any alcohol at all! Dumbfounded, the officer said, "I'll have to
ask you to accompany me to the police station. This breathalyzer equipment
must be broken."

"I doubt it", said the truly proud Texan, "Tonight I'm the designated decoy"